nzgirl Sex School: Finding your G-Spot

Ema points out that for a lot of women it’s not so much a spot, as an area, and is best found when aroused. It’s an area of spongy tissue on the inside wall of the vagina (closest to your pubic bone), which will feel different to the rest of the vagina and may feel bumpy or corrugated.



When aroused the G-spot will become swollen and sensitive, and if you haven’t experienced it all already, stimulation of the G-spot can make you feel like you need to pee as it’s near the opening of the urethra. The G-spot is different from the clitoris in that it’s less common to experience an actual orgasm with building sensation, climax and a definite end point. It’s also more likely that the sensation will be an ongoing, pleasurable, sometimes full body feeling, which some people report lasting for as long as 30 minutes. Yep, 30 minutes! We say that’s a very good reason to find the g-spot, so without further ado, let’s begin.

Step 1: Where can we find it?

Ema says that the best way to find your G-spot is to press inside the vagina when you’re aroused, a short way in behind the pubic bone, until you feel an area of spongy tissue. It may feel small like an almond or it may be spread over a larger area, and should feel different from the rest of the vaginal wall. Some women find it easy to find their G-spot if they squat down or if they lie on their backs with their knees to their chest, or their hips raised.
 

Ema recommends going to the toilet before you begin so that you can relax. You might feel like you need to pee while your G-spot is being stimulated, but just breathe through it until the sensation becomes more pleasurable - we promise you won’t pee! If you’re taking someone with you on your G-spot adventure, send them for a manicure first! Nails should be short and trimmed, and you should use plenty of lube. Explain to your partner where your G-spot is and then get them to move their finger in a “come hither” motion against the inner wall of your vagina.

Get them to try a few different methods by changing the stroke and speed of their movements until you find something that feels good. Get them to stimulate your clitoris as well, to educate your sexual response. Firm pressure usually needs to be applied to the G-spot, so play with the pressure until it feels good to you. However, sustaining firm pressure with the fingers can cause RSI (Repetitive Strain Injury), which brings us to our next point; toys!

There’s a whole range of toys out there that are specifically designed for the G-spot, so all you have to do is find one that’s perfect for you. There are glass dildos like the Glass Twister (which provide very firm pressure), mini vibrators like the Mini Corsar and the gorgeous (mantel-piece worthy) ‘s’ shaped toys like the Serpentine. Toys such as the Rock Chick are designed to stimulate the G-spot and clitoris at the same time, and are small and easy to use, so are great for people who are just learning about their G-spot.

The G-spot is not far from the entrance to the vagina which means that toys can be smaller than standard vibrators or dildos, and will usually have a curved end designed to press against the G-spot. Ema recommends always using lubricant when playing with toys so that you don’t experience any discomfort, and says that different toy functions, like vibrating and pulsing, will all have different effects on different people.

 
Step 4: What was that?!

Things should be feeling pretty good now, so relax and enjoy it! If not, don’t despair, every woman is different and it may take a while to figure out what feels fantastic for you. Keep trying different strokes and pressures until you find one that works. And watch out for ejaculation!
 

Yes, women too can ejaculate and this sometimes happens with G-spot stimulation. It’s nothing to be afraid of - it’s perfectly natural and it’s not pee! Female ejaculation is a semen-like fluid (without the sperm) that comes from little glands either side of the urethra and it won’t necessarily happen as you orgasm. Ema recommends warning your partner that ejaculation is a possibility (especially if they’re performing oral sex on you), just so that they don’t get a surprise.

 

At this stage you should be feeling downright fantastic! Some women will experience g-spot orgasm, which has been described as a more intense experience than a clitoral orgasm, while a lot of women will feel an intensely pleasurable sensation without actual orgasm. Usually a firm massaging pressure is more effective on the G-spot than light friction, so often the G-spot is not fully stimulated during actual intercourse. However, sex positions like woman on top or being penetrated from behind (doggy style) can help push pressure down onto the G-spot. Ema says the key to any sexual satisfaction is knowing what works for you, so get to know your body. You’re in charge of your sexuality so learn what makes you feel great!

 

Check out www.dvice.co.nz to get your hands on toys of your own and for advice on getting your very own crazily-satisfying sex life, or pop into one of their gorgeous stores. There’ll be no seedy guys leering at you from behind the counter - we promise! For those of you seeking extra credit see The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-Spot by Violet Blue.

That should keep you busy until next week's lesson where we discover the male g-spot!